Why do I hate my family?

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God, if it weren't for the future ahead of me, I'd have killed them already. It will be hard but you have to do it for you and your child. I hate life when I wish I could spend more time with my kids than work.

Because the older you get, the less you choose to put anyone before yourself. I dont know where to begin in fixing it. But I am of value because God loves me, even if no one else does. I'm just a normal girl with friends, but my family hates me!

I hate my family

I hate My family too : I can remember feeling like an outcast as early as the age of 5. I remember my mom beating me and calling me a whore for discovering masterbation. I was 7 when I was ripped out of a room full of kids and verbally assisted by my mother. As the years went on I was Always looked at as the bad apple. At 11 my mom would leave me to watch my two younger sisters who had formed an Alliance against me. At 13 I was A whore and a druggie. Again never even tried either. At 14 a was told to stay home from school because some girls wanted to fight me and the school I went to was full of racists and druggies. The racism was coming mainly from a group of Guamanian girls who hated me over a boy. At 14 my moms friend tried to have sex with me. Guess who my mom blamed for that. I was About 5 months along when I finally Told my dad. He forced me to have an abortion that almost cost me my life. I had To write goodbye letters to my family. At 20 my daughter almost lost her future. I struggle every day to stay happy and to feel the love of my children and the love of the small percentage of good people still out there. I have No real home and I have No real family. Life is really hard for me right now. Ok, this is so similar to my situation so I'm going to say it straight away, therapy is the best answer here. I've been going for a while now and it's really fucking hard but so so worth it. I grew up in a very difficult childhood, I had very religious parents and I also had to come out. Anyways, I felt just like you. I was mad at everyone, for letting me down, for how they'd treated me, I was just so filled with hate. All I wanted to do was get away from my family, then I thought I'd feel better. When I couldn't get away that hate spread towards me too. It spiraled downwards until I found myself with an eating disorder, depression, self harm, and two suicide attempts. Now that I've started therapy they've helped me understand how powerful anger is. My therapist explained to me that anger is one of the most powerful emotions because it's a coping mechanism that we use subconsciously. It's so powerful because it isolates us, protects us, and we're not even aware of it. I'm trying to forgive people for how they've harmed me, my therapist tells me it's called radical acceptance. If you do decide to not go therapy maybe try to get under those feelings and find the emotions you're blocking. Because of my past I have a lot of fear and distrust but up until therapy I thought I was just angry. Anger isn't a bad emotion but when it starts to impacting your life it's an issue. I still plan on getting away from my family when I can because i haven't fully come to terms with them but that might change in a year or two when we've worked thorough more issues. I don't know where you're from but here in Ireland we have resources for people who were abused. There's therapy and groups and things to help you. I know what it's like to be abused and I honestly wish you all the best. I know it's difficult to let go of anger when it's so powerful and easy to feel. You probably don't want to talk about the abuse because of everything you've kept bottled up, but at some point you have to let it out, otherwise it just grows and grows until you're left all alone because you feel safer that way. Therapy is one of the scariest things I've ever done and anyone who seeks out help has got some balls to do it. We all need therapy, nobody has a perfect life, but the ones who actually seek it out are some of the strongest people on this planet. You're stronger than you think, you'll be ok : Good luck. Until recently 3weeks ago, I kept on trying to be part of them. I blocked their phone numbers, deleted them from my Facebook. Now I question ¿why, did I try so hard to be part of them. When I clearly see, that the only times they ever reached out to me was when they wanted something from me. Or to live off of me for free. Leaving me broke, damaging my credit, etc. I couldn't choose the family I was born into. But I can choose the family I make for myself. So Why do i hate my family picking great people, friends, they are and will be my family from now on. I only wish I had done so sooner. NoI will not have an evil seed such as hate in my hearts garden. Dude, you remind me so much of myself at your age. It took years of healing to get to where I am at today and I'm still not better. I've been angry since I was 12 and am still angry over a decade later, granted I've grown a lot. Right now you're dealing with a lot and I get that. While therapy may not be an option, you may want to look into it because where you're a minor your insurance may cover it, completely. Especially where you're looked after by your grandmother. I can understand where you are coming from with harboring so much hatred, I really why do i hate my family. I'll spare you my life's story, why do i hate my family outside of therapy, here's the best advice I can give: What do you find happiness in. For me it is simply sitting and clearing my mind. A form of meditation, if you will. I find happiness in cooking and looking up recipes, although I could never afford to actually cook most of them but it's the idea that I may be able to one day. Find your happy place and go there when you need to. Music has always been a great release for me. I'll put earbuds in and listen to some kind of music as loud as I can which will usually reflect my mood. I'll listen to what I call my angry mix when I'm upset which contains music I relate to when I'm angry. I'll usually turn it up so loud that's all I can hear and I'll block the rest of the world out. Google Stress techniques for anger and you'll come back with a ton of stuff. A lot of it is mental training and will take time because healing is not an overnight process. By the way, this kind of stuff works a lot like addiction problems. You won't be able to accept the help you need until you are ready for the help. So a good question to ask is this: Do I think I need help or do I know I want help. Evaluate where the hate came from and how it relates to the love you once felt, for you can not hate and feel apathy or indifference at the same time. Hate is as strong as love and in opposition to it. So if you hate one thing, you should love the opposite, and if you love one thing you should hate the opposite. So instead of focusing on what you hate in the family, find the opposite that you love and seek it actively. If you are too consumed by the hate to even see love at all, then evaluate what it is you hate about them specifically, and isolate the actions, choices, values, priorities etc. Then you can love your family, but hate some things they do which you can have specific opposition to. Im Bisexual And I Have A Girlfriend. We've Been Dating For Almost Half A Year And My Family Doesnt Know Cause My Moms Homophobic And She's A Complete Bitch. She Judges Everyone Then Catches An Attitude When Someone Judges Her. My Dad Is A Workaholic And Doesn't Spend Any Time With Me And My Brothers And Literally Wastes His Life Away In One Room After He Comes Home From Work. I Live With Both My Parents And Im Not Close With My Other Family Members At All So I Have No Where To Go. And It Kills Me Everytime My Mom Says Something Why do i hate my family Hoping Im Not Gay And That If I Was Gay She'd Kick Me Out. Since Im Only 15 16 May 30 I Still Have 2 Years Of This Shit. But You'll Be Able To Leave Soon.

Sometimes letting a family member go is what's best for our own emotional and mental health. I interrupted chasing my dreams as I was fairly close to a bigger city my son and I would of liked to gone to. My sister had influenced me to come back closer to home. Negative thoughts, mixed with worry, make a person miserable to live with. All I can guess is that your siblings are angry that you take up a lot of family energy and that maybe your parents feel helpless to help you. I'm so sorry I did that but I cant live your treatment of me anymore. My others will when I lose the last of my loved ones. Cat Adams Jennifer, look for a garage apartment, or room for rent close to where you need to go to school. So it might be hard but have to try your maximum to understand the root cause of the conflit if you two are in one and accept the fact the fact that she's your mother and she has put up with you and all of your troubles when you were a baby and went throu all of the troubles of protecting you.